Monday, November 29, 2010

You really do learn something new everyday

What did I learn? I learned I can NOT think straight when I'm angry or upset. And when I'm alone or simply happy I can think better and with more reason.(: My anger sparked this morning when my mom took my phone away and told me to stay off the computer, and only grew into a fire thinking about all the things that add up and make me want to rush to get a job so I can move out of this place sooner. 
Today I've spent a lot of time on my phone when I got it back, trying to delete old texts. Right now my inbox has 227 received and 100 sent, so I still have a lot to get rid of.:P
On another note, I wish I was more blunt.

Au revoir, les amis.(;

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Pondering the Decisions..

So much on my mind. So much not going right... 
Here's part of what's up: my mum was talking to some company on the phone about bills last night, afraid about losing the house, trying to make partial payments on bills, and trying to figure out which bills NOT to pay. I've seen the overdue notices lying around, she hasn't been over reacting about this one. In fact, she seems less worried about it than me. Almost $2,000 behind on bills, and there's not much I can do to help, I'm still looking for a job, but still getting nowhere at this point. I previously asked if I could help improve her horrible organization and spending habits, but she refused. Mum told me she's going to cancel the landline, yet she's still talking on it, same with one of my sisters. The mum and I had a little argument about the whole sitch, which obviously did less than help. One question that lingers in my mind is: "What's Christmas going to be like this year?" A bike, I just wanted a bike, that's it. I might as well forget that. I hate it when she spends money on things nobody in this house wants or needs, and concerning Christmas, I'd much rather have one thing I want rather than a bunch of things I don't want. We'll see how it turns out when the time comes. But still, I just want a bike and a job right now. Simply, I'd love to get rid of all the shit we don't need around here, and keep and get things that are actually important, BUT I'M NOT THE HEAD OF THIS HOUSE. I sure as hell would love to be, things would look very different if things were ran my way... I'm impatient to leave this place.

The decision on my mind concerns my veganism. I haven't eaten meat in.... 8 months now? I know it probably isn't a big deal to most others, but it is to me being that I've felt very strongly about it. Now, the problem is, I'm intaking to many carbs and not enough protein, mostly because non-animal protein products are to expensive (and I still don't have a job, so I'm not the one buying groceries.) My sis has started eating meats again, and she's lost weight and is looking good, I'm proud of her.(: But I'm going the opposite way./: I taught myself to find meat repulsive, (Ick, meat:P) so I don't know how I'll do... And I surely don't want people to ridicule my decision, but it's my decision... What to do? What to do?

Au revoir, les amis.(:

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Do something different.

I feel like I've been thrown out of a loop, but I can still be okay on my own.(: I love my friends dearly, and miss some of them, so we'll need to hang out, including the friends I haven't hung out with yet.(; I am STILL IN SEARCH of a job, but there's been no luck with that yet./: I'm impatient, I know. 

I've been "enjoying the little things" like Ryan told me, and the only thing I don't like about that is telling a person something like, me being so excited because I staked all my textbooks on the ground so I could stand on top of them to get a book out of the top part of my locker because I'm to short to reach it.(X Ohh welll.(:

I even got a new email address, and I guess I'm happy about that too.(: OH, and I got to manually organize and re-download all 257 songs onto my iPod, although there were a few minor mess-ups.. But I'm still proud.(:

Au revoir, les amis.(:

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Ahhh, I love us.(:

Finally was able to hang out at mojo with Ry, Vron, Morg, and I all together. I love those people.(: I think I'd be able to go through life with just the three of them as the closest people to me, and I'd have everything I need to be perfectly happy and content, no lies.(: If only we could hang out and actually have adventures more often, that would make me the happiest person everrr.(: 
Morgan did get to sleep over last night, and we made  a silly video, edited it, and stayed up late. I had fun, I love my wife lots.(:

Sure it's a short blog, but that's all I feel like saying right now.

Au revoir, les amis.(:

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Hold on to your kite, just don't let me down

I really haven't been writing in my blog as often as I'd like to- that's the truth. But I'm trying, that's that's the truth too.(: 

Recently I've been listening to podcasts on my new iPod. I love to listen to the HowStuffWorks podcast because they discuss interesting topics from "Why do people blush?" to "How sleepwalking works". The other podcast I listen to once daily is the "Learn to Meditate", which is really amazing and I learn so much from it.. I'll most likely write more on that another time.(:

I can NOT wait to get my melodica!:D I ordered it tuesday, so it should be here in FIVE MORE DAYS! And I'm impatient. But really excited, as you can see.(:

Another thing I am STILL waiting to get is a job.:P I've been filling out and handing in applications, but STILL nowhere I look is hiring./: So I'll just have to enjoy being jobless in the meantime. 

I wonder what I'll be doing this weekend, hopefully something fun and/or constructive.(: But right now it's raining.): And I hate dreary days such as these./: Hopefully I still have a good day regardless.

I feel like I have a very sound mind (today at least) despite the despairing things that have been on my  mind which I've been trying to suppress. I've also been talking and listening to people and things which help lots.(: Friends always help.(:

Well, until next time, 
Tot ziens voor nu.(: